Responsibility

It’s time to take responsibility for my own happiness.
You’ll get through this. Look how happy you can be.
Look forward, live but remember.
Breathe in and breathe out and make choices.
Be sure in your actions and for once listen.
You can’t make everyone else happy,
it’s time to make yourself happy.
And I already feel much more free.
I’m grateful and I feel confident.
No matter what, it’ll be alright.
I will get better and I will enjoy life.
No matter how many hardships life throws my way.
I’ll make it through and I’ll laugh and smile.
I’ve listened to my heart, but it’s time to listen to my mind,
and then my heart will not be hurt anymore.
It will hurt but I trust in all, that this descision will make our way.
And it will be the right way.

Let Her Go

Can’t even take a walk in fear of meeting people.
Can’t even drive away in case of people seeing me.
Can’t even stay at home because I need to breathe.
Can’t even delete my past because I want to remember.
Can’t even stay mad and angry because of my changing moods.
I am fucking pissed and I need to change it all right now.
Right fucking now.
I need to say goodbye to my past self.
And bring forward a better one.
Someone who’s not afraid.
Someone who’s happy.
Someone who’s confident.
Someone who can fight.
Someone who’s strong.
I need to let her go.
She’s weak and she’s ugly.
I need to get away,
so that no one will remember her.
It’s time for me to kill Emma.
It’s time for her to die.
But do I have the strength,
to murder someone?